Friday, 3 April 2009

chaotic

heart lodged in my throat
I try to spit it out-
it refuses to go either way

dried-up thoughts
crackle loudly within my head-
fully charging it up

lost my grip
on the things I handled
too well-
will summer breeze
bring it all back?
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19 comments:

  1. dreamscapes3 April 2009 at 08:55

    sure it will..
    very nice

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  2. - A - C -3 April 2009 at 09:34

    you won't have to wait long to see...

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  3. Seachanges3 April 2009 at 12:46

    loosing grips - ah all the time! It'll be summer soon!

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  4. Whitesnake3 April 2009 at 13:22

    Interesting way of putting it!

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  5. Robin Konarz3 April 2009 at 13:28

    Gautami, I like this. I can feel the "dried-up thoughts crackle loudly within my head."

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  6. Janice Thomson3 April 2009 at 15:28

    Oh! Love those first lines - what an emotion it gives.

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  7. Wayne Pitchko3 April 2009 at 18:38

    nice words as usual and I agree...great first lines

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  8. Danielle Mari3 April 2009 at 20:40

    I especially love that first stanza! Startling imagery.

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  9. J. Andrew Lockhart3 April 2009 at 21:05

    "will summer breeze
    bring it all back?"
    I think so.
    That's what I'm waiting for. :)

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  10. cyclopseven4 April 2009 at 02:52

    Hope summer breeze will lighten things as it sweep by.

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  11. Lorraine4 April 2009 at 04:03

    Our chaotic thoughts, how well you put it, love this ma petite :)

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  12. claire4 April 2009 at 06:24

    Lovely, Gautami. :D

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  13. Gavin4 April 2009 at 07:54

    I like the sound of "crackle loudly within my head". I'm joining napowrimo, am a bit nervous!

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  14. Vasilly4 April 2009 at 19:28

    I love this!

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  15. WriteUp Cafe4 April 2009 at 22:04

    "heart lodged in my throat
    I try to spit it out-
    it refuses to go either way"

    nicely said..

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  16. Ms Ulat Buku5 April 2009 at 03:07

    This is good. Wish I could write like you.

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  17. Dorte H5 April 2009 at 04:12

    What a fine poem!

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  18. Kerrie6 April 2009 at 02:42

    I like it Gautami

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  19. Tasses9 April 2009 at 16:27

    I like the edginess quietly lurking within the simplicity :-)

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