Saturday, 19 February 2011

a spinning tale, which makes no sense

I draw a line on the sand
and see a streak of light following it
an eerie light, that is so creepy
a premonition of something
I can't see the top,
the bottom is fathomless
yet I spin it
weaving a tale out of it
yes, I'd catch a grenade for you,
but I will not keep it.
I will throw it right back at you.

"after all , destruction is what you are best at"
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28 comments:

  1. Nonna Beach19 February 2011 at 20:37

    Destruction and revenge...hollow, souless pursuits...very good use of the prompt !!!

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  2. Ramesh Sood19 February 2011 at 20:55

    This is indeed evloved poetry ..I enjoy reading you..always..

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  3. Tammie19 February 2011 at 22:19

    I love that it does not make sense. still there are times when there is green sparkles in the sand that one can see when they drag a stick in the sand... memories.

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  4. Ames19 February 2011 at 22:31

    Very profound!~Ames

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  5. June Freaking Cleaver19 February 2011 at 23:00

    I think arguments are verbal grenades...

    Great poem!

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  6. Sue19 February 2011 at 23:06

    Good job on this poem.

    =)

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  7. Harshad mehta20 February 2011 at 00:35

    Do spin it, do weave a tale out of it.... can it not be loving tale?

    I think it can be.

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  8. Greyscale Territory20 February 2011 at 00:39

    In some ways this makes no sense, but in others, it has a gut wrenching likeness to many war stories that feature death and destruction...also...senseless!

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  9. anthonynorth20 February 2011 at 01:48

    This one's very deep.

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  10. Kodjo Deynoo.20 February 2011 at 02:13

    Not sure, you sort of turn my thinking on it's head at the end, but I can see the emotion and passion vividly in this

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  11. sandra20 February 2011 at 04:50

    imagination flows so high...to the top!

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  12. Anna20 February 2011 at 06:32

    Good poem with subtle shifts of meaning, written from a prompt that I really don't like at all.
    Well done!
    Best wishes,
    Anna
    Anna's SC week 42 Maisy-Jane

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  13. cj Schlottman20 February 2011 at 07:06

    Interpersonal conflict is so ugly! I agree with June Freaking Cleaver. "I think arguments are verbal grenades.."

    Well done!

    Namaste..........cj

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  14. Kat20 February 2011 at 08:44

    Very good use of the prompt, which was a difficult one. I'm impressed with your ability to use it in such a deep poem. Kat

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  15. Judie20 February 2011 at 09:09

    Great poem, and great use of the prompt

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  16. teric20 February 2011 at 09:22

    A spinning tale is right; spinning good and bad.

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  17. Gems20 February 2011 at 10:00

    Dark...the beginning confuses and leads to questions but makes perfect sense one the poem is fully read...and goosebumps appear!
    Gems x

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  18. Rawknrobyn.blogspot.com20 February 2011 at 15:08

    I like it. Just reading it gives me a catharsis. Nicely done.
    xoRobyn

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  19. Tumblewords:20 February 2011 at 18:23

    Intriguing! Love the back and forth, the come and go of this poem's energy. Great job!

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  20. Rekha21 February 2011 at 08:39

    wow...this is immensely beautiful...your poetry is so vivid and rich....I feel embarrassed to call mine poems... :)

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  21. DeLi21 February 2011 at 11:22

    a witty spin up!

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  22. Lisa at Greenbow21 February 2011 at 16:51

    This could be anger ebbing and flowing. I hope it tops out.

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  23. Karen S.21 February 2011 at 17:19

    oh yes you have to love a strong and destructable person! very nicely done!

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  24. SandyCarlson21 February 2011 at 19:25

    This resonates with me. That damned grenade!

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  25. ms pie22 February 2011 at 11:35

    ohhh the sting.... oozing wound...... it is good to walk away and come back another day..... love the confrontation though it feels so good!!!

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  26. Jim23 February 2011 at 14:17

    Spinning your tales and never seeing the top. That would be an exercise in futility. Please look upward. :)
    I like it, GT!
    ..

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  27. Patrick26 February 2011 at 19:48

    Well rendered. The voice of this poem is the voice of someone I need.

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  28. Jenny5 March 2011 at 14:08

    Incredible.

    Where were you when I was leaving my first husband. I would totally have used some of these lines.

    Love this dark and haunting imagery.

    Love the truth of these words.

    Thanks for a wonderful use of this difficult prompt.

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