I saw the message in the sky
arrived as soon as I could
weeds embraced her lovingly
ignoring her raucous breathing
her closed eyes were strung together
(I wanted those to open and look at me)
I took a blanket, covered her carefully
although I knew it was a lost cause
it was the 11th Anniversary of 10th day
of I don't recall what (wait while I think)
she obviously had forgotten it too
or I wouldn't have found her in water
I had been anticipating to meet her
those words had already formed in my mind
"do you remember what we promised when we met...?
certainly not your inevitable death "
Full of feelings Gautami..you always throw surprises.. thanks..
ReplyDeleteI love this one. You have such a way with words, Gautami! Such beautiful poetry :)
ReplyDeleteHi Gautami, this was incredible . very nice .
ReplyDeleteThis was so moving and thought provoking. I know it's a poem but I would love to hear much more about this relationship. Good job.
ReplyDeleteUnsettling. And disturbing.
ReplyDelete(the qualities of many a good Centus)
=)
Great job! Love the raucous breathing, and still thinking about her closed eyes being strung together.
ReplyDeleteVery moving. You words have certainly set me mind alive with wonder and possibilities.
ReplyDeleteMalisa
Very unusual lines and full of emotion....
ReplyDeleteBeautiful and sad, you're so good with that twist at the end
ReplyDeleteI could feel the weight of emotion. love it!
ReplyDeleteThat was so emotional . Mine is where I hope to be in 11 years My divorce is imminent so I need to prepare to not look back
ReplyDeleteVery moving. I had to read it a number of times. Well written.
ReplyDeleteHaunting piece, Guatami. Beautifully written and evocative.
ReplyDeleteI had to read this through again, very moving. And you set the scene beautifully, I can see it in my mind's eye. Very original take on the prompt. Kat
ReplyDeleteWhat a sad piece. Very masterfully woven tale.
ReplyDeleteVery mooving and provocative
ReplyDeletewow! incredible writing. left me with an eerie feeling i won't shake for awhile.
ReplyDeleteYou have an exceptional way with words.
ReplyDeleteWonderful and mysterious.
ReplyDeleteThis gave me the chills. So poignant and sad. Victoria
ReplyDeleteGorgeous. And as someone else said, unsettling. Wonderfully extraordinary.
ReplyDeleteWhat an unsettling and lovely use of these prompt words.
ReplyDeleteI wrote this prompt in honor of Mr. Jenny's and my 11th Anniversary which was on this Saturday! And this was such a wonderful read that it was like an Anniversary gift.
Thank you for linking.
Wow.