Wednesday 29 April 2009

raise the bar

blood in my veins rages
comparable to sounds
a turbulent ocean makes
in the wake of a storm
pulsating to an unheard beat
my skin quarrels with me
warning me of lost opportunity
INSISTING I BE IN YOUR SERVICE

I DON'T THINK I CAN BE SERVILE
opportunity lost warns me
and my quarrelling skin's
beat pulsates in a manner
unheard of. silent storms wake up
turbulence within me
which make oceans tame
compared to the sounds of
raging blood in my veins

"I move away and see your skin pulsating"

26 comments:

  1. IT certainly doesn't seem forced. Very powerful stuff here.

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  2. You're getting more and more powerful.

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  3. Hi Gautami, You've definitely raised the bar here, the very thing that is making the blood in your veins rage, is also the catalyst for some amazing poetry!
    -Andy

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  4. Whoaaa man,amazing.
    Gautami actually pulsating poetry.
    Keep raising the bar.

    ~Harsha

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  5. I love this poem. Its now one of my favorites.

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  6. I like the pulsing in the poem itself and the image of skin quarreling - all very powerful

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  7. So vivid! I always love the way your images stir things up and stay with me after I click away...

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  8. Forced? you all make it flow easy.

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  9. Excellent. I could feel the words as I read them.

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  10. wow, very masterfully done!! great job!

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  11. Just heard about you losing your blog - I am SO sorry and can completely understand how devastating that must be. Hope Blogger can help retrieve it for you.

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  12. tut tut!
    I thought you were such a lovabled young woman!

    *giggles*

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  13. Such a strength in your words.

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  14. nicely done..."quarrelling skin's beat" i really like

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  15. Very nicely done. I really enjoy poems that flow both ways.

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  16. I liked the repetitiveness of turbulence and ocean. well done, enjoyed it! - meg

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  17. Your poems are getting more powerful.

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  18. Wow, that was dynamite. I wouldn't have known you felt forced when writing it. Love the idea of skin quarreling, superb.

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  19. Very powerful and inticing read.

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  20. Nice imagery here. You're starting to change my view of poetry with all the interesting forms you use.

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  21. very powerful piece Gautami!

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  22. Your work is amazing - it is a treat to read you Guatami.

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