Thursday 20 March 2008

watered down------Sunday Scribblings/Friday 5

sitting on that fence
she watched the water from the stream
flowing down the vale.
slight wind touched her with a kiss
interrupting her train of thoughts.
with a simper, she stood up
self consciously walking back home-
her flowered skirt bellowing around,
her flip-flops making a silent sound.

when the cottage showed up
her contenance changed-
no matter how, no matter what
she just did not get it.
warming the water, pouring soap suds-
she got into it with a vengeance

"loadful of dishes waited for her in the sink"

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There are too many thing I just don't get...I did not want to rant on my blog for today. I have been doing that a lot lately. I know this is something most women would identify with. No matter what, we cannot avoid household chores! I simply don't get it! Incorporated too the Friday 5 words:
kiss, train, fence, vale, simper

35 comments:

  1. Gautami -

    Very cleverly crafted to incorporate the five words... well done! ;)

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  2. I sensed the emotions in her. Well written. Must be very challenging to weave a story round the five words.

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  3. the first images made me feel very well the delicate environment and then the next message...very real!

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  4. nothing like reality to change your mood

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  5. soapsuds and reality - I was hoping she'd have a bubble bath, but....

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  6. That's true, some things can't be avoided. Oh we suffer the oppressed gender ;)

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  7. oh, i can relate... although doing the dishes is not my most lothesome chore...

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  8. From dream to reality! It happens, doesn't it?

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  9. If only dishes could wash themselves and we could stay outside enjoying nature and the breeze!

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  10. Many of your female characters have intense emotions. Here I see a woman who doesn't understand why she can't be left to contemplate beauty, but instead is always left with washing up, more than likely after others' mess.

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  11. simply lovely gautami.. i do so dread household chores... and more days than not do not get it at all.......

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  12. "No matter what, we cannot avoid household chores!"

    Amen, sister.

    Amen.

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  13. friday and bogeyman. that related.

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  14. Comforting images at the beginning and then, those dishes. I was thinking she was preparing her bubble bath, at first. Very strong images here and realities women can't escape. Have a nice day.

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  15. Such a sweet, romantic landscape at the beginning that has to be blighted by conditioned demands of reality.

    O the shame of it all!

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  16. This inspired me. My Mozilla has been giving me fits, but I'm online again. Gotta check this week's prompts!

    Your blog is so creative and fun. Thanks for your comments on mine too!

    Blessings,
    Linda

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  17. What a peaceful beginning and a neccessary ending - the dishes must always be done! Happy Easter

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  18. Ooh, I hate washing dishes! What a shame to be pulled away from such a lovely sounding setting to have to come home to do the washing up.

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  19. Thanks for visiting my blog. You are very lucky that you are a runner and I know that I should do that. The weather here has been too cold for me to enjoy getting out but I'm hopeful with Spring coming. I'm a walker, but just can't get into the running thing... wish I could.

    I love your poem!

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  20. heh, I liked this.

    i like the subtle details and you incorporated the 5 words well.

    =]

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  21. You poem hits home! I've been making breakfast and doing laundry while trying to read a few poems and my husband is stretched out in his recliner with the remote in his hand! Great poem of a universal experience!

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  22. You captured doing dishes beautifully and those words weaved into that moment well.

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  23. I love reading your stuff, not just because you are a good writer, but because its always nice to see that someone on the other side of the world from me still ponders the same basic things - people are still people no matter where they live...

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  24. this really spoke to me. i could really feel her freedom being snatched away by those sinkful of dishes!

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  25. Hi Gautami! I found this really interesting because of grandma. She begs me to leave her the dishes. She is old and deaf and nearly blind. She so desparately wants to have things to do in the dusky light of her years. Good write!

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  26. I completely get her feelings - esp. since dishes is my most loathed chore - thank goodness I have three girls I can pass them off to! :) Very enjoyable - thank you!

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  27. I hated to teach my daughter the never ending tasks of being a woman... do men have the same list of what is expected?
    I didn't get the male list...

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  28. well done! I enjoyed this a lot.

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  29. I don't get how it's always the never ending work like laundry and dishes which women are pushed into. It's nice to do some of the repairs and outside work and actually do something that stays done, at least for a week or so. :)

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  30. you are teasing us with your onomatopoeic footwear, gautami. ;o)

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  31. The dishes never do go away, do they? I could definitely identify with the sentiment.

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  32. now that was absolutely something i could relate to!!!... and excellent response to both prompts!!

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  33. I like the poetry of her billowing skirt and her noiseless flip flops.

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  34. nice mix of poetic images and the thud of being brought back to reality . don't know if the comment makes sense but poetry doesn't always go hand-in-hand with everyday practicalities. hehe.

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