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| The Revenant, 1949, Andrew Wyeth |
but I had a good fight
I like to show of my bruises
standing tall in my whites
my dirtied whites
yet I cause a sensation
wherever I go
women swoon over me
I sway in that adoration
and corners of the room
hold me upright
but when I look into your eyes
I see scorn in the blank stare
how much longer
do I endure black eyes
to see a smile on your face?
it never comes
I know it will never ever come
but behind your pummeling
I can see your raging emotions
no one else sees it bu ther and that to me is the scariest part...eerie
ReplyDeleteVery unusual take on the prompt -- well done.
ReplyDeletecorners of the room
ReplyDeletehold me upright
Great image!
What a story you got out of this. And I agree with Jinksy on that corners image.
ReplyDeleteWow,a really powerful piece. Your contrbutions to Carry On Tuesday are really appreciated. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteInteresting take... but too often those bruises go unseen... hidden in the white facade.
ReplyDeleteThis is a very powerful tale. :)
ReplyDeleteWhat a stunning use of the prompt word and Andrew Wyeth's painting. The inventiveness and the emotion revealed was outstanding.
ReplyDeleteThere is a definite feeling of threat in Wyeth's stance. Strong reaction to the prompt.
ReplyDeleteFor me, this goes back to the Western notion of the hero wearing white and the villain wearing black...yet it seems that too often, the "hero" is the villain, if not in word or deed, in terms of his ugly insides and thoughts.
ReplyDeleteI like the end best. He knows there's something there, also that it's more than anger. And even though he doubts he'll ever get it out of her, he's not going anywhere.
ReplyDeletePowerful words. The character is truely determined ...
ReplyDeleteThis is full of sensation.. elusiveness..endurance..hiding..I always love the last lines that you separate from the main body of the poem..they seem to be the essence..Jae
ReplyDeletegautami! Well done!
ReplyDeleteSounds like lots of pain!
ReplyDeleteBoth physical and emotional.
Good write.
Blessings
It cuts into the guts.Very powerful words you have here. Great!
ReplyDeleteHank
Gautami,
ReplyDeleteRead all pending poems now and what a feast! I really loved your closing lines on Shreds. You said the truth so clearly.
Take care
I like it. Sometimes one must weather seething passion to find its desire. Well written.
ReplyDeletePowerful piece - puts the reader inside the artist...
ReplyDeleteUnique response - well done.
ReplyDeleteA very good attempt GT. This prompt looks simple, is very powerful as an image, and yet tough to do a piece on.
ReplyDeletecheerz,
Wow - a very powerful piece from the revenant's point of view!
ReplyDeleteYou have used the prompt beautifully here and much emotions!!
ReplyDeleteGreat use of a combination of prompts!
ReplyDeletelove it,
ReplyDeletebeautiful words.
this one has an unusual n forced groove to it. very different
ReplyDeletewow unique... I like those last lines much... :)
ReplyDeleteStrong writing & imagery here. I also agree with Brian Miller's comment: "no one else sees it but her and that to me is the scariest part...eerie"
ReplyDeleteSmall question on "I like to show of my bruises": Would that be "I like the show OF..." OR "I like to show OFF..."?
OR, have I missed out on what you meant?
Hello! I had the same question as Emanita .... I must tell you how intriguing your Magpie is. From beginning to end, I enjoyed it.
ReplyDeletelove the wordplay.
ReplyDeleteamazing piece.
Hohoho,
ReplyDeleteWhat charming poetry you have posted here.
Invite you to share 1 to 3 poems with us, anything could fit the theme of object,
Cheers.
Hope to see you in.
Happy Writing..
xoxox
Wow--this is powerful--blank stares are the scariest. It's a soul less person who looks back at you with those eyes!
ReplyDeleteThis is a very dark painting despite the use of pale colours - or perhaps the pale colours highlight its darkness. It was the same with your poem: Dark and brooding, but at the same light in touch.
ReplyDeleteA good take on the image!