looking out of my bedroom window, I see
that man toiling; sweating in dust and heat-
pausing for a moment, stands on his feet
then sits down on the floor, wishing to flee
deep in thoughts, he stares at the church door;
longing to escape the sun and retreat
into its calmness, and out of the street-
wishing to be one with God and soar.
his employer yells at him, he comes back
out of his reverie and works yet again.
practical world has intruded for now
ah, well he has to get back on track-
setting aside his thoughts, becomes sane-
with renewed vigour, he toils and how.
Thursday, 17 April 2008
common man----Sonnet
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This is a wonderful poem, I can so clearly picture this man in my head, working hard labor, longing for a break from it all. Great writing.
ReplyDeleteThe poor man!
ReplyDeleteI wrote a 'little song' too..
a good clear portrait!
ReplyDeleteBeautiful. I really enjoy seeing a good sonnet.
ReplyDelete:-) Cyn
Hi! Thank you so much for entering your name into my book giveaway! I just wanted to remind you that you may enter another time if you want! May the Lord bless you.
ReplyDeleteYou paint quite a picture. Made me think about my desire to soar.
ReplyDeletewonderful!
ReplyDeleteHow well you have sketched out the worry lines written by his kismet on his forehead !!
ReplyDeleteReminded me of one I had written earlier on a similar subject
http://la-muse07.blogspot.com/2007/11/untitled.html
I was wondering if I could interest you in a poem I wrote about a 39 year old who suffered from cancer. It isn't for any prompt .
http://la-muse07.blogspot.com/2008/04/life-in-hurry.html
A painted portrait - so vivid and human.
ReplyDeletei love the way you were able to see into his thoughts... that is priceless...
ReplyDeletea clear portrait in words. I started to almost feel the cool, church sanctuary air and silence he was longing for.
ReplyDeleteYou have obviously written a few sonnets in your day, as this one rolls out so well. A glimpse of a moment, an imaginary window into a man's mind and heart. Very nice.
ReplyDeleteThis portrait is so universal. I thought you were sketching me! Love the soaring part!
ReplyDeleteLovely depiction. Appeals to me as a product of a corporate world.
ReplyDeleteMarvellous. How alien the life we have to live is to the life we want to live.
ReplyDeleteIt's beautiful the way you illuminated a moment in this man's world. Athough it was a mere pause, you showed how much can occur in that moment of thought.
ReplyDeleteVery nice!
I love your way with words.
ReplyDeletegreat write. the words come out beautifully painting an image in the mind to see into his thoughts
ReplyDeleteHe hesitated because there was more guilt waiting for him inside the church than there was out there in the heat and the dust.
ReplyDeleteAtleast outside he could just get lost in his work and forget his troubles...much easier than reliving all of his transgressions and admitting them to a Priest.
a poignant portrait.
ReplyDeleteI can clearly see this moment in time. Well done.
ReplyDeleteharsh reality for so many portrayed beautifully!
ReplyDelete