strange hissing sounds
sure, had brought me here this night
sultry atmospheric feelings in my heart
as if tearing through barbed wire
my skin twitched
In every pore and every nerve.
withholding to the carved door
I strived for sanity even though
I was spinning- hard and fast-
snakes slithered at my feet
coming in hoards
from their opened underground caves
fearing the darkness, I fell on the doorstep
rolling into fetal position,
willing the reptiles away
"when daylight broke, I was entwined
by ropes of my own thoughts"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Lines have been taken from Paisley, Mariacristina, Lirone, Writerwoman, and Lissa for Patchwork Poetry!
Wow, I'm very impressed by how you put this together.....how did you know where to go looking for the lines, it is well-stitched too.
ReplyDeletevery well done, all the lines sounded just right
ReplyDeleteI like the ending, I think that's the best line, I think I had that same dream and I'm also terribly afraid of snakes so you dive into that fear quite well
oops, again I forgot to leave a direct URL, which I'm trying to do with Blogger blogs cause I really think people don't care much to browse my blogger profile page
ReplyDeleteVery strong imagery here throughout. Excellent work!
ReplyDeleteit is well stitched! Also makes me feel a bit queasy, all those snakes together,,,,
ReplyDeleteNicely done! Slithering snakes and ropes of thought! Nice!
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed this. We poets are weird- consumed by our own thoughts... love it!
ReplyDeleteIt's great how you wove these lines into an integral whole!
ReplyDeleteThe Maggots
Fantastic ending and I love all the "s" sounds in here! Gave me chills!
ReplyDeleteI like where all these lines took you, gautami. I still haven't posted mine. It's fun, isn't it?
ReplyDeleteThis poem scared me. Nice job!
ReplyDeleteVery intense. The imagery of the snakes makes this poem have a primal feeling to it.
ReplyDeleteThat worked out really well, Gautami. What fantastic imagery, as others have said. Mostly, though, this was really sensory -- sultry atmospheric feelings in my heart.
ReplyDeleteWow. What a line!
Exssssssssssssscellent!
ReplyDeleteGreat team work :D
ReplyDeleteLoved that. And very apt. Myth and mind are so closely related.
ReplyDeletesuch imagery. Great movement and transition.
ReplyDeleteBeen there too
It is really amazing the way you have stringed together those different lines; great work!
ReplyDeleteThis is ssssssssuperb!
ReplyDeleteHowever I do feel taking a ssssshot at sssssnakes is not in ones best interest essssspecially while sssstanding in front of one.
WS
Chief CEO
Snakes Worldwide Inc.
thiss is nice, esspecially the ending. :)
ReplyDeletenightmarish stuff... well done!
ReplyDelete