Tuesday, 26 February 2008
jumping from the cliff to prove my love?
contemplating in the eerie silence of forest
where the occasional sound is that of the wilderness
all alone in my tent,
I am fighting for love
oh, don't worry I do not doubt yours for me.
in all that maze one of us has to be sane-
as you can't do it, I take the mantle.
my withdrawing to myself is not coldness. it is
compressing my love until I yearn to explode
to splinters, burning in passionate embrace.
explanations? you need platitudes? all I can say is-
it’s either fable or truth and that’s based on your perception.
don't you realise,
your movements have seduced me
to do what was incomprehensible before?
now that i did-
your mere words become a weapon
to hit at me. you with your insecurities
think that you do not deserve
my deep, intense emotions,
which in a way sustain me.
or else I am in a way of speaking-
mere breaths from dying.
"I will not bargain for love
either you accept it
or forget it altogether"
The italized lines are donated by jillypoet, lirone, scott, mariacristina, sara and paisley for patchwork poetry.
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I kept getting images Parvati reading the riot act to Lord Siva.
ReplyDeleteI love how you reused the fragments.
ReplyDeleteIt's great.
No bargaining about love them!:)With the lover lost in the beloved...
ReplyDeletePowerful piece. No messing - in words, or attitude.
ReplyDeletenicely put together with all the fragments. The link for 'your movements have seducedme' doesn't seem to be working, btw
ReplyDelete"now that i did-
ReplyDeleteyour mere words become a weapon"
so succinctlty put
Yeah, it can be difficult to make any sence from a patchwork of thoughts - I think you've encapsulated the message into the last sentence. Phew! Nice one..
ReplyDeletehey ,you did these so well...
ReplyDeletenice combination of the prompts, guatami... i think you have stated you case,, and there can be no misunderstanding... very nicely crafted...
ReplyDeleteyou did well putting this together. I think your words are quite hard-hitting. how many of us can confess like this?
ReplyDeleteThe voice is of a passionate lover who accepts all or nothing. She drives a hard bargain, but i get the impression she must be worth it.
ReplyDeleteAmazing! The way you use pieces and bits to produce work so strong is amazing!
ReplyDeleteA well put together and powerfully delivered message. Thanks!
ReplyDeleteThose patches worked wonderfully.
ReplyDeletemyrtlebeachramblings.blogspot.com/2008/02/totally-optional-prompts-22808.html
Wow. Love the way you used my line.
ReplyDeleteAnd I also found myself really drawn to this part:
in all that maze one of us has to be sane-
as you can't do it, I take the mantle.
That really stands out to me and resonates.
A patchwork poem is the perfect device for a poem about love since love is like a quilt. You know how it is: one person wakes up with 70% of the quilt and the other has a mere 30%. It's never even.
ReplyDeleteWhat a great way to explain this!
powerful and passionate!
ReplyDeleteMake the committment; take the responsibility; set out the terms; roll the dice;
ReplyDeletejump from the cliff anyway?