I nudge corners
into the centre
they resist
I persist
my hammer hits again
a column resonates
I hear astral music
in a sandbox
door frames shake
as I chisel away the concrete
I want mud walls
on which I can do finger painting
"enough space you saved for me, give it to me now"
intriguing...so what does astral music sound like? carving out our own space...i get that...
ReplyDeleteIntriguing indeed. Is the final italicised line a quote?
ReplyDeleteVery very interesting....we, as the reader, can interpret this in our own mind...one way or another. To me, that makes a fiction so very right!!!
ReplyDeleteMy 55 is posted!! Here is the link for you.
"Astral Music" makes the creative vibe a prime impetus that gives so much more a resounding construct! Love this poem! Relate to; "I want mud wall on which I can do finger painting"; very richly primal!
ReplyDeleteMind you don't hit your fingers with the hammer: you'll be needing them for the finger painting.:-)
ReplyDeleteViV
I too want to know what astral music sounds like. Love the idea of finger painting on a mud wall.
ReplyDeleteThe music of the spheres. We are all gifted by the Universe. That's what poetry is....a gift.
ReplyDeleteThanks for this one shot.
Lady Nyo
You delight us and engage all our senses,,,, tactile, sensory, visual,,,,,,,,,,and primal appeal
ReplyDeletelovely 55er,'
joanny
Really enjoyed this, Gautami. I like the idea of fingerpainting in mud walls.
ReplyDeletethey resist/ I persist. Love that bit.
ReplyDelete( if you nudge with a hammer, I do not want to be around when you decide to be forceful)
An intriguing poem Gautami.
ReplyDeletePamela
Amazing how music can fill the spaces in side ourselves.
ReplyDeleteI did a music oriented thing, too.
astral music in a sandbox...wow..this sounds special
ReplyDelete(The preceding 55 was brought to you by "This Old House")
ReplyDeleteNice 55, Gautami!
Finger painting and astral music. What could be better?
ReplyDeleteAh yes, a woman weilding tools with knowledge and skill, building her own space, rather than waiting for someone else to do it. I love your imagery, your words, and especially that last line,
ReplyDeleteElizabeth
Are you sure you teach Math and not Prose?
ReplyDeleteMost Excellent 55 My Friend.
Thank you so for playing and for your wonderful support.
Have a Kick Ass Week-End
Put me in mind of the singing sand mounds (hills) I read/heard about. Fascinating.
ReplyDeleteHow wonderfully fascinating! I love that idea of finger painting on mud walls.
ReplyDeletei like the idea of fingerpainting on mud walls
ReplyDeletegreat images you portray
thanks for the visit
Happy Weekend
and I enjoyed reading.....thanks for sharing Gautami
ReplyDeletelove astral music in a sandbox and finger painting on mudwalls... very nice
ReplyDeleteI always envision that astral music sounds like the slow playing of each tambura string. I loved the surreal, ethereal feel of this poem. Very nice expression.
ReplyDeleteProactive and deliberate carving of space. Nice one.
ReplyDeleteWorking towards the center, towards the harmony that's hidden, removing the walls. Very well-written piece, leaving space for the reader to work in as well.
ReplyDeleteI can hear it with your lines--the music of the spheres, the soul, the spirit! Thank you!
ReplyDeleteLike a dream...
ReplyDelete... of the primal artist.
Magical piece, indeed!
ah the malleable surface is indeed enviable
ReplyDeletesound boxes and painting on mud walls sounds fun...I wish I knew what astral music sounded like :)
ReplyDeleteI like the primal essance of carving out space, astral music, painting with fingers on mud walls - feels real.
ReplyDeleteTruly beautiful and enchanting writing@
ReplyDeletegood contrasts in this!
ReplyDeleteOh, beautiful. It gives me the feeling of being a child or having the perspective of a child playing despite this adult body. Astral Music indeed.
ReplyDeleteP.S. Thank you for visiting and commenting on my 55. I always appreciate your kind words.
An intriguing take on the prompt.
ReplyDeleteInteresting how you put astral music to the hammering of concrete and finger painting of mud walls. Active imagination!
ReplyDeleteVivid imagery here- love it!
ReplyDeleteI love the idea of destroying what is supposed to be good (the concrete walls) in order to create beauty. We all need to do more of that in our lives.
ReplyDeleteLovely piece.
Very interesting! Damaging something can bring more beauty out of it... like percussion out of beating on drums!
ReplyDeleteOh.. I really enjoyed your style here, Gautami... it's rich and has a way of really arousing the reader's interest!
Sometimes one must get down to the basics...
ReplyDelete