Friday 11 February 2011

lined up...

that house,
with quaint windows beckons me
I peep inside.
wavering shadows hide something
outside sunshine enhances the depth of darkness inside
I rub the walls
the crumbled powder of blankness
engulfs me
I imagine a dog sitting at the door

"headhunters have placed the heads on the inners walls.
what ails them, I wonder?"

35 comments:

  1. I like the mystery and innocent curiosity of the narrator. Very interesting poem.

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  2. i like the feeling of the walls, it is something i would do...not sure about that last line, if i get it.

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  3. Soft walk through thoughts there . . . I spent about 3 minutes pondering the last line though.

    Without Words is my 55 this week.

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  4. outside sunshine enhances the depth of darkness inside

    love the line, beautiful magpie in 55.
    Cheers.

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  5. Mysterious and scary. I really like this and want to know more. :)

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  6. Gautami...
    You have turned an innocent looking house, into something enigmatic.
    Wonderful Job My Friend.
    Loved your 55!
    Thanks for playing, and have a Kick Ass Week-End...G

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  7. Gautami, you added quite the twist to this. It seemed very peaceful and then ...

    Pamela

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  8. Loved that last line. Things are not always what they seem.

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  9. Very intriguing with a surprise ending... I enjoyed this on a lot!

    ~laurie

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  10. "I rub the walls"

    I liked that simple image.

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  11. I can't seem to shake the idea of the kind of headhunters that find you a new job. Twisted, I know.

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  12. I love mysterious houses!

    Nice 55. :)

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  13. Liked the twist and the bizarre ending...I'm thinking portraits of ancestors dripping cobwebs...nice magpie/55 combination.

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  14. goodness what must lurk inside...

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  15. It seemed like a nice little house in the winter snow - then, all of a sudden you took that mysterious turn!!

    My 55 is at:

    http://rnsane.blogspot.com/2011/02/friday-flash-55-happy-valentines-day.html

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  16. I like the feel here -- but the last lines are in quotations, who is speaking these words?
    What ails the headhunters or the heads?
    "crumbled powder of blankness" is a neat description thought.

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  17. A little spooky, all those secrets within!

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  18. Nicely done, Gautami. Happy you're still writing...

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  19. Loved the feeling of mystery left behind.

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  20. you've made me wonder more about this mysterious house. nice magging!

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  21. Pretty certain it isn't what you intended, but I like the idea of the dog saying that last bit. "what ails them?", indeed.

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  22. This was such a cool read. I did not expect the ending, but really enjoyed it!

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  23. Oh! I would never have guessed. Nice piece!

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  24. Really interesting poem, mysterious and scary one. So nicely written!
    All the best
    Marinela x

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  25. Those last lines, they could be read some many ways

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  26. Isn't that what we do when we meet someone, mentally rub the walls, trying to get in, and then making our own pictures from spoken words? Love the feelings in this one,

    Elizabeth

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  27. This poem has a beautiful flow to it. I liked hearing the inner thoughts of the narrator, and at the end I wonder if the question is about the head hunters or the hunted?

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  28. quite a chilling 55, Gautami.. in all its innocence, it sure made me ponder deep!!
    Sometimes, the most mundane of landscapes present the most creative of imaginations!

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  29. I love the "crumbled powder of blankness" and the surprising twist at the end!

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  30. "sunshine enhances the depths of darkness"... very true and a great bit in this eerie piece.

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