Sunday 18 February 2007

Painfully yours...First crush...Sunday Scribblings

This time the Sunday Scribblings prompt is Crush… first crush, current crush, illicit crush, painful soul-crushing crush..

What I write is really about a school girl’s crush. A very naïve and stupid school girl in that awkward age where one tries to be a grown up but falls flat on her face. 25 odd years ago, we were very immature, not knowing how to handle our emotions. Come to think of it, I still haven’t learnt….

Compared to my last post Ambrosial, this one is rather tame!!

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Painfully yours.....

I was 13 years old, I think. One day my right hand started aching, just like that. I took some painkillers and ignored it. The fleshy part between the wrist and elbow, it reddened and swelled up. Now my parents got worried. So we took an appointment from the doctor. We reached at the appointed time but due to some sort of emergency, the regular doctor didn’t turn up. In place of him, there was this very young doctor, fresh out of medical college. My dad wasn’t too pleased but one look at him, I was thrilled to bits. He asked us to sit down and asked me what was the problem. I showed him my hand. He held it. My heart turned over. When he asked questions regarding that, I forgot to answer. I just kept looking at him idiotically. My dad answered those looking at me with annoyance. The doctor examined my hand, prodding the fleshy part. When he let go of my hand, it was kind of let down. The doctor did not look me into the eyes, wrote down medicines, asking us to come after a week.

As the doctor's clinic was very near our place, I used to go there just to get a glimpse of him. Some days I did see him. But I did not have the courage to say a word. I was a shy 13 year old. The hand did get better but come next week I was ready to go to the doctor, for my hand to be held by him. He was there but so was our family doctor. This time he handled it. The other doctor looked on, I looking at him. To give him credit he did avoid looking at my face. As I did not need any more medication, that was the end of it. I remember it with very vivid details as he was my first crush. I used to think of him but after a while I had huge this crush for West Indies cricket player, Vivian Richards. That is another story altogether...:)

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Do chk in here for more on the topic.

46 comments:

  1. Oh, a handsome young doctor. That is the ultimate material for a first crush. His hand holding yours, I can imagine the effect. Lovely imagery.

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  2. I remember many I had as a skinny, shy lad. Thanks for reminding me!!

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  3. Hee hee- that was a cute story! all of ur doctors were old and crabby!
    Oh, and p.s. Gautami- you may certainly add me to your blogroll- I am honored that you would ask!

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  4. What is it about doctors that is so irresistible? The power to heal? The diploma and accumulation of knowledge? The selfless service of others? In any case, I've totally been there...

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  5. I guess a handsome doctor can make being ill all worth while!

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  6. Handsome attentive doctors can often make one feel better! :)

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  7. A handsome doctor can work at all ages :) Very cute!

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  8. Painful at the time, but you have an amusing way of expressing it now!

    Someone should write a book about awkward teenage behavior. My low point was a girl putting her head on my shoulder at a movie and I didn't put my arm around her! Just let her lean there for like two hours!!! My best friend and his girl friend had set us up...

    She wasn't much of a talker and I was only slightly better with the talking skills. But I just had this feeling we should exchange one or two words prior to physical stuff. Guess I was just an old fashioned kind of guy...

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  9. Thanks for sharing your "crush story". I enjoyed reading your scribbling :)

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  10. Come to think of it, I still haven’t learnt….

    I think part of the fun is not learning!

    Thanks for visiting my blog earlier this week!

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  11. Ha! Beautifully told and bang on about those kinds of feelings, that first mindless crush...the rush of hormones...

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  12. I liked the details in this - and the honesty - it brings it all back; the awkwardness, shyness and the obsession. You tend to convey the feelings through recording the events rather than describing in detail the emotions; a satisfying read.

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  13. Gautami,
    Those awakings to our hormones were exciting and frightening. Your description tells a perfect story. My first, like you describe, was in 7th grade art class. She was the teacher. I see her still from time to time, she's in her 80's now and I'm still infatuated with her, or at least the memory of those past days.
    rel

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  14. Ha! I enjoyed reading this! My first crush (I think) was on my first-grade teacher, Miss Young. I was six, and I thought she was the most beautiful person in the world. I followed her around, kissing her hands....it must have been really annoying.

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  15. First crushes are so intense, especially when it's the younger one doing the "crushing" on someone who is much older and extremely out of reach.

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  16. If I were that doctor, I would have played The Beatles' "I Wanna Hold You Hand" softly in the background as I examined you. But that's MY style. I'm a rebel that way.

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  17. My doctor was my dad so I never experienced a crush like yours! Although I did have a crush on my volleyball coach at 13....

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  18. Haven't thought about my young crushes for years. I think yours was more interesting!

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  19. such a sweet memory - thank you for sharing it with us :-)

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  20. i can remember the name of the nurse who looked after me in hospital when i was twelve

    thanks for this one

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  21. I see you in my mind's eye - you so shy - he holding your hand. Oh my, I had moments like that as a teen.
    I'll have to look up Vivian Richards on Google, maybe they'll have a picture so I can see what your other "crush" looked like ;)
    Namaste

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  22. Great memory. I like the way that he avoided eye contact ---- in his own way, just as nervous as you were!

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  23. What a healing first crush! You shared it well! I could see you peering in hoping to catch a glimpse of him!

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  24. Ahh first crushes! They are so wonderful and horrible at the same time. Nicely written.

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  25. Hmmm, nothing like a handsome doctor for a first crush. Thank you for stopping by. Well written.

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  26. No, we dont grow up ... yet, why should we? When eyes meet just in the street, a moments glance and it feels as though one is in a time freeze. Lovely post about a young girl and her crush.
    hus for you :o)

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  27. I had forgotten--I had a crush on a handsome young doctor when I was in high school too. Thanks for sharing.

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  28. Enjoyed your story lots. Told well---and yours was---that kind of story is one we can all identify with, I think. Somewhere along the line we have all felt that speeded heart / tongue-tied "Oh gosh, he's touching me" feeling and we are most of us embarrassed or at least chagrinned to look back at it. But the memories do make us smile. Thanks for sharing.

    This didn't print the first time so I'm trying again. Sorry if you get it twice.

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  29. bittersweet memories!
    well written, gautami.

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  30. OH, yeah . .. there's something about authority figures like doctors and teachers that impacts a young girl, I've found. Great story. Thanks for sharing and for stopping by.

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  31. Oh I love this peek into a wonderful crush that grips us all in our teenage years. Wonderfully written!

    XO
    Kristen

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  32. Very sweet story of youth. Thanks for sharing!

    Giggles

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  33. very nice bit of nostalgia there and very natural writing to boot. thoroughly enjoyed reading this. thank you.

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  34. "When he let go of my hand, it was kind of let down."
    that said it all....!!

    very cute

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  35. Dear all,

    It was so long ago but I remember it very well.I think there is something about doctors that make us girls swoon.

    paul: Me too an old fashioned girl..lol! But I wanted the doctor to hold my hand again...

    Thanks for stopping by and reding this. For your inputs too.

    As I am unable to thank you all individually, I am doing this here in this one post.

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  36. I enjoyed this very much!
    Nice writing, Guatami!

    Margie

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  37. There was a girl named Yolande in Grade school who I believed was actually an Angel...
    she took her wings off during the day...
    I can still see her face and her golden hair was always backlit somehow...
    she probably couldn't turn her halo off..((sigh))

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  38. margie: good to see you back and thriving..

    Many hugs.

    donn/h.e.: Ah...I can just yolande...the angel..in your words, thoughts...sweet memmories...:)

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  39. Cute! I really thougt you were going to say you went off and tried to hurt some other part, just to have to go back and see him! ;) hehe

    :)

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  40. Oooooh, Gautami, your story resonated with me so well...for I actually started dating my handsome doctor, but ofcourse, I wasn't in school then but in college and the doctor in question was fresh out of med school, oh those were the days!!! ;)

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  41. Oh, such a sweet, sweet story. I do remember those types of painful, yet wonderful crushes!!!
    Ironically enough, just last night at my job in a healthcare facility, I had a girl probably about 13 wanting to know if a certain radiology tech was working and she wanted to leave a note for him!!!

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  42. amber: at that time I was rather stupid. Or I would have hurt some other part just to have a dekko at him.

    lotus: what happened to that handsome doctor?

    tangerine: Did she leave a note? My heart goes out for her. Oh, those crushes! They are so painful at that age.

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  43. He's still around Gautami. We're good friends now :)

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  44. Oh, wow. Crushes on doctors are the worst to have, especially when you're young and innocent, and still not sure why they don't love you back.

    In college, ANY time I'd see a guy in doctor uniform walking to the medical school, if he was my "type" (dark hair, brown eyes, not too tall, glasses, smart-looking), I would just die on the spot. I've always had a real soft spot for docs.... I even had a bit of a "crush" on a recent doc of my son's... how terrible is that! LOL

    Thank you for sharing (and thank you for your comment! I'm so sorry I'm late visiting your site.)

    Rachel

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  45. lotus: That is good.

    rachel: I think it becos doctors can heal that most fall for them. They listen too quietly. That is one great incentive.

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