Tuesday, 6 September 2011

hitching a ride in rusted trails
















abandoned to erode
that wheel has tales to tell
I don't care to know
I think of all that I lost in snow
hazed snow of the mind
layered by layered
light is my focal point
stirring from dawn to dusk
resting in the darkness
to rejuvenate the heart
when I pick a rusted nail
I sandpaper it
observe the rust fall to ground
I still don't care.

"Can I hitch a ride from you to go to the next town?"

38 comments:

  1. hazed snow of the mind


    Great line!

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  2. This says so much! I like the rust falling from the nail.

    PS My word verification is "emotrap." That seems to sum up the speaker's feelings very well!

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  3. Love the philosophical nature to this piece. Rusted days flaking away, then left for newer things.

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  4. loved the play between the mind and the physical condition of the truck..thanks for stopping by ...

    cm jackson http://states-of-mine.blogspot.com//

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  5. Your poem had me thinking this way.

    Junked

    The wheel told her tale
    in the tracks of rust streaking
    down to the gravel
    rising up her breadth
    of cast iron hub still strong
    though sinking each year
    further into past
    transgressions and omissions
    while we just moved on.

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  6. beautiful rhythmic quality to this poem and I liked its message.

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  7. Love the last almost 'throw away' line!
    Great prose.

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  8. It's interesting to think of what we don't care to know.

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  9. Interesting and reflective take on the prompt.

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  10. that wheel has tales to tell

    And Magpie has brought them all to the surface! :)

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  11. Beautiful..I love the idea that rust can be worked on to show the light..to clear the snows in your mind perhaps..Jae

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  12. Always love your verse, Gautami.

    Pamela

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  13. A hint of the bittersweet, a pinch of acknowledgment, a good dose of acceptance - just how I like my poems. :) I especially loved:

    I think of all that I lost in snow
    hazed snow of the mind
    layered by layered
    light is my focal point

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  14. ... sandpapering a rusted nail. What an image. I enjoyed your Magpie.

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  15. That was soulful and reflective. Lucky nail - to back as new!

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  16. Sanding the nail is the perfect touch. Vivid image for me!

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  17. I like "hazed snow of the mind---stirring from dawn to dusk" It sounds familiar; the mind seldom at rest.

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  18. Very thought provoking!
    Blessings

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  19. Rust is such an evocative word, perhaps in this case it is the memories of the past as they are discarded and a new life embraced. It is great to read it over and over again.

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  20. Very deep,I liked what you did with the prompt...
    I have had a moment or two when I simply stopped caring,but with a new day I was rejuvenated osagain :)

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  21. Beautifully written in a reflective frame of mind. thank you for your comment on my blog.

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  22. Indeed very reflective...good be be back here after days..

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  23. I get the "don't care to know". Too hard to climb back up. The sandpaper/nail is a fine touch.

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  24. If only this wheel could talk...

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  25. There are endless possibilities of tales to endure if it could talk. You have brought these out brilliantly.

    Hank

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  26. I think of all that I lost in snow

    Such a brilliant line.

    (My word verification is "hikes." Seriously!)

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  27. Love this. Very thought provoking.
    http://charleslmashburn.wordpress.com/2011/09/09/he-was-a-ford-man-2/

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  28. To borrow your phrase, there are layers on layers of thought, of image, of subtle relationship within this poem. Each has its own reality, its own truth. They rub, cross over each other, yet still stand alone - their own statement of the reality perceived.

    I like this poem, rusted nails and all. Thanks!

    neil

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  29. Madeleine Begun Kane12 September 2011 at 20:31

    Really good and powerful.

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  30. Really good and powerful poem. Thanks for a fine read!

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