Thursday 3 March 2011

rivulets of space

spaces. unseen spaces.
can you parade it between us-
tangible in its wake
I leave my space to smile at your a boyish charm
a flame gasps and slips in between
I let it defy with my typical thinking
a space can't question it

I put my elbow on my thigh,
go into a trance
creating bit more space

"we can let it melt later, merging it with musty rivulets of ourselves"

21 comments:

  1. Dreamy and intriguing... nice take on the prompt!

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  2. There's more to this than meets the eye! I suspect eroticism here... Lovely.

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  3. Love the last few words! "musty rivulets of ourselves" Wow!

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  4. Gautami, a dreamy piece. I love the ending.

    Pamela

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  5. I find myself staring off into space as I ponder the depth of this poem.

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  6. unseen spaces . . . very nice work, as always, guatami!

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  7. I love the idea of tangible spaces.

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  8. Very pretty and soothing, Gautami.

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  9. Interesting thought-provoking poem. Very nice flow. I also suspect there's more here than meets the eye. Nicely done!

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  10. Interesting poem, seem a little bittersweet too.

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  11. More to this than meets the eye - indeed! Great last line!

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  12. Like Tilly said, tangible spaces is a curious notion... makes me think of picking them up, rolling them around between fingertips. And sharing something so curious is certainly intimate and beautiful.

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  13. very beautiful wording..

    you rock.
    A++
    :)

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  14. I love the creative space this poem operates in. Nicely written.

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  15. I wish I couldwrite like that....

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  16. I am no more amazed..no more surprised..I come to read something unique here...I find it.. feel happy..and move on to return.. Thanks!!!

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  17. Subtle erotica is very sensual indeed - was it by design or accident?

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  18. love your take on the big tent poetry,

    I tried this time, here is mine:
    http://itistimetothinkformyself.blogspot.com/2011/03/big-tent-poetry-in-55-words.html

    Thanks for reading.

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  19. beautiful lovely images and emotions!

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