Wednesday 17 March 2010

now close, now open










my magenta bed cover
mocks me. my turquoise
night wear clashes with that.
I fumble on the mattress
and let mists of sleep
block me out
nightly shadows
cast furtive glances
on the mirror

when morning sounds wake me up
the sun looks down on me
fern on my window too mocks me
magenta turns to maroon gold
I stare at it unseeingly.
misty tears trickle
fast and furious.
I am stuck with my closed plans
how do I open them now?

13 comments:

  1. Love the last two lines.

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  2. Plans open anew, the always do...
    ...rob
    Image & Verse

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  3. Nice, simple, direct, compact, all good qualities. And it all rides so well into the equally condensed ending lines which really add to the momentum of the poem. Nice job, very nice!

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  4. Great description and an emotional quality, a frustration, in both stanzas.

    -Nicole

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  5. I love the last stanza! Wow!
    Pamela

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  6. open up to the air
    let your heart pound
    breath all the sounds
    feel the wind around
    can you hear silence
    when all you need is sound
    feel the wild wind
    let go to the howl
    its gonna be peace day ahead

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  7. I like how the clashing colors in the first lines set the tone for the rest of the piece.

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  8. I agree with Raven- great emotion and description of frustration. I have written one with the same tone years ago when my children were young, and the weather was grey...

    India! I love cooking the foods of your country- I had personal lessons

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  9. I love the question at the end, opening up all sorts of speculation.

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  10. I like the trip in this one...

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  11. Hi Gautami,

    I really like the lines:

    'mists of sleep/block me out'
    and
    'magenta turns maroon gold'

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  12. a lot of different emotions in this...I enjoyed it

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