Wednesday, 11 July 2007

Celebrating Frivolity------3WW

Another book read and review written. A thousand Years of Good Prayers By Yiyun Li is a collection of short stories about contemporary China and its recent past. A much recommended book. Do check it out.

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Private
Crossed
Rinse

Celebrating Frivolity----Pantoum

against that period I entrench myself here
with private moments, I am thrilled to dote
on curiosity of dead, which at once appear
from frivolity which help in holding me afloat.

with private moments, I am thrilled to dote
on awkward persistence with by far disdain
from frivolity which help in holding me afloat.
construe not on your heart while mine is slain

on awkward persistence with by far disdain
rinse your hatred with such recurrent haste.
Construe not on your heart while mine is slain
nonetheless crossed, onset comes with waste.

rinse your hatred with such recurrent haste
wipe the slate and commence everything new.
nonetheless crossed, onset comes with waste
managing requires skill, bestow upon its due.

wipe the slate and commence everything new
which looks on turmoil and in no way shaken,
managing requires skill, bestow upon its due
in no time, peace would prevail, to be taken

which looks at turmoil and in no way shaken.
against that period I entrench myself here
in no time, peace would prevail, to be taken
like curiosity of dead, that again reappeared…



16 comments:

  1. Is this a villanelle? I don't have time to remind myself of the scheme, so forgive me if I'm wrong.
    I like the line "rinse your hatred with such recurrent haste"

    and "construe not on your heart while mine is slain"

    A powerful piece.

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  2. Hi Gautami,

    I'm curious as how you write these. Do you select the ending words first and then write the lines?

    I like the pace of the poem, the turmoil and persistence you keep returning too.

    Rose

    xo

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  3. i love the same line apprentice quoted. something about rinsing hatred is very vibrant.

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  4. Bravo! It takes discipline to write this structured verse. Especially like this : >>Construe not on your heart while mine is slain. :)

    the pantoum has a sing-song feel to it, and is fun to read.

    Thanks, Gautami!

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  5. Someday I will try one, but for now I will continue to enjoy yours.

    Interesting word combinations:

    ...awkward persistence with by far disdain/rinse your hatred with such recurrent haste./Construe not on your heart while mine is slain/
    nonetheless crossed, onset comes with waste.

    Well done, Gautami.

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  6. Gautami,

    This was excellent and resonated in my soul. Well done!

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  7. Very interesting structured poem, lots of powerful lines.

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  8. this poem is so alive! it jumps at you until you read the last line and then it lingers.

    you have a way with words gautami. like some of your readers i like the line construe not on your heart while mine is slain.

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  9. Hi Gautami! Again your words create such an intriguing web of depth and imagery that is so wonderfully rich and full of feeling. And the line "construe not on your heart while mine is slain" is perfect -- I love it. You write wonderful pantoums -- and wonderful poems of all styles!
    :)

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  10. I'm not schooled in poetry at all, but obviously this is some sort of patterened piece. It's very interesting.

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  11. You used rinse not just once but twice??? I struggled with once :-/

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  12. That is SO beautiful.

    I just love to read all the words you like to use, and the unique and incredible way that you put them together.

    Wish I could take one of your classes. To that end, what if you were to give a lesson to us? Give us a task to do... something you might give your students?

    just a thought...


    Be back soon!
    Scarlett & Viaggiatore

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  13. on awkward persistence with by far disdain
    rinse your hatred with such recurrent haste.
    Construe not on your heart while mine is slain
    nonetheless crossed, onset comes with waste.

    loved this one...and ....

    wipe the slate and commence everything new
    which looks on turmoil and in no way shaken,
    managing requires skill, bestow upon its due
    in no time, peace would prevail, to be taken

    this one best of all...to rinse hatred and to wipe the slate and start new!!!

    I have to say this is my favorite thus far!!!

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  14. "wipe the slate and commence everything new"

    Wonderful piece!

    I followed your 3WW link, and tried my first piece yesterday.

    Thanks, Gautami

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