Thursday 9 September 2010

crooked window




















nay, I did not say that
not anything anyone need know
how did the whispers get heard
why did the wind spin a tale
plucking from the silky depths

you stand behind that window
your reflection looms large
I stare angrily at that
muttering under my breath
when did you steal my veil

soon your face will get blue,
turning you into an apostrophe
the frames will engulf you
I will keep counting the branches
while you cut out the slashes

"you a faceless entity, hiding behind the city"

27 comments:

  1. This poem is too close for comfort for me. Every line moves me.

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  2. Strong, vivid and more than a little chilling.

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  3. Strong emotions in this. I love the beginning: "how did the whispers get heard" ?

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  4. Wow - strong poem. Doesn't it feel good to get that out?! I liked this prompt and the deep emotions it allowed to surface.

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  5. Strong piece! I especially like "turn you into an apostrophe". Well done.

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  6. The anger slips into the chilling darkness of spiteful curse! A dynamic piece of poetry!

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  7. This one goes rather deeper into the prompt than some of us. Bravo.

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  8. Gautami
    This is beautiful and the last stanza is so powerful!
    Pamela

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  9. Your 'editor' might be ducking for a few days, but that won't hurt anything. That slant view can be a wonderful thing, but also exhausting at times.

    Elizabeth

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  10. whispers & wind!

    in life, i really really love those moments when we say, "what was that?" and try to listen carefully to what may or may not be the wind

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  11. Excellently crafted, combining prompts! Excellent magpie! =)

    -Weasel

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  12. Stunning, dramatic, and a chilling poem. Very well done!

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  13. Gautami this is a gripping and powerful piece...i can feel the intensity in your words. :-)

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  14. I 'second' others' words. And add BREATHTAKING.

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  15. the fierce power contained within your words...took my breath away...nice mag!

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  16. I like how you put the body with the built environment.

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  17. turning you into an apostrophe

    What a wonderful way to put somebody in their place!

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  18. Your anger comes through so clearly, and yet you portrayed how anger can make you lose your clarity.

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  19. scary, angry fear conquering going on here.

    Powerful stuff.

    Rene

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  20. The old expression "Packed a wallop" comes to mind.

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  21. You've chosen an elegant punishment for someone who misquotes. Definitely the sort of response that takes some time

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  22. "turning you into an apostrophe"--I love this line.

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  23. I second Erin, "turning you into an apostrophe" is my favorite line too. Such powerful anger and so well done. Thank you for this.

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  24. ooohhh/... that was dark and chilling!!
    Loved the way you have expressed that sentiment here!
    Loved the 'apostrophe' bit - fantastic and vivid!

    Well played!!

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