Tuesday 7 July 2009

abstracting

random papers
a few torn haphazardly
some cut precisely to size

lay jumbled on the floor
my nimble fingers trying
to bring some kind of order

that thimble-sized man
jumped into that disorder
moonwalked all over it

eyes fixed on its movements
I watched the fireworks
with a sense of wonder

patterns fell into place
with such grace and fluidity
papered into so much beauty

when he disappeared again
into my deep thoughts
I knew it was all unreal

"reality is creativity that comes from deep trance"

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Lately I am trying for abstract poetry. I don't know if I am succeeding or not. Feedback is welcome.

17 comments:

  1. I think this is a nice attempt at abstract poetry. Then you've always been a really good writer. Have a great day.

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  2. I find your poem visual like a hallucination.

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  3. this is very whimsical in nature, a refreshing break from the ordinary. such well placed words and language makes this jump off the page and grab the reader to the cutting room floor. -lawrence

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  4. I love the unspoken futility of order, the constancy of chaos in this poem. Nicely done.

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  5. I've often felt the same way...

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  6. Yes, the papers and the thoughts all mixed up and the moonwalking! Love it!

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  7. Abstracting works well for you - this piece takes me on a wonderful journey -

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  8. Maybe we are who we think we are, 'til we wake up!
    <3

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  9. Your abstract poetry is a wonderful read.

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  10. This I would compare to an acid trip in words. And I love your use of "moonwalking" - apropos considering the times.

    - Nicole

    Mutiny in Six Parts

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  11. Timely and timeless.

    (In a strange way, we will all miss him.)

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  12. I love the images you've built up with this poem. :)

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  13. I think that your abstracting attempts are working really well. This is a really compelling picture of the creative impulse/inspiration.

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  14. wonderful! it flows so well...

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  15. I like the way "moonwalk" and "movement" sound together. There's also a lot of vivid imagery here.

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