Sunday, 24 February 2008

coiled and cocooned

she unwrapped the garden hose

watering the flowering pots
droplets of water fell on her skirt

soundlessly her lips formed the words-
"do you ever think of me
when storm rages, trees sway

when clouds make love to the earth
with the help of the rains
soaking it sopping wet

spring emerges as a naughty child
desiring to play with harsh summer
giving way to serenity of autumn

do winters bring longing
to feel one with me
closely cocooned by me forever"

neatly she coiled the garden hose
shaking the droplets of water
wringing her skirt dry, she left

Come ride the Poetry Train...

27 comments:

  1. I like this Gautami because you show the connections between nature and our actions. We've lost that living in crowded cities.

    Rose

    xo

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  2. I like this as well. Nice to see how you focused on nature.

    I went the "other" way:

    The Touch of Oneness

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  3. I like the image of spring as a naughty child.

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  4. The four seasons. Nice.

    "trees sway
    when clouds make love to the earth."

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  5. So sad that, to so many, nature is a foreign country.
    You expressed it well.

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  6. this is really beautiful,gautami.

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  7. You are getting better and better all the time! Your seasonal descriptions are exquisite and I like the way you go back to the hose and the skirt in an unsentimental way.

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  8. 'when storm rages, trees sway

    when clouds make love to the earth
    with the help of the rains'

    Oh, Gautami - I LOVE these lines. I love watering my garden with a watering can because I love the intimacy of it.

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  9. I love how you have anthropomorphically endowed the four Temperate Zone Seasons with such character.

    I would probably go craaaazy being forced to endure the two seasons, wet and dry, of a Tropical zone.

    That being said, I have come to loathe Winter...I suppose that I should stop kvetching and just relocate a little further South where Winter isn't such a tedious, life altering, mentally challenging, energy-consuming, nightmare!

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  10. i love the line "when the clouds make love to the earth", beautiful

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  11. Gautami, it's "does winter" or "do winters." It's a good poem, and I like the way you have ended it.

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  12. I like the way the closing lines bring us back to the opening image. The poem is like a circle, in that way...

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  13. I like the way this cols on itself and the metaphors I found.

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  14. From a simple act the narrator muses on the cycle of life. Very nice.

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  15. This is beautiful , Gautami! You have capture every essence of the seasons in such beautiful words!
    I think this one is my favorite from you!

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  16. There isn't much I can say that the others haven't already said. It's a lovely poem and I'm jealous of your ability to show without telling.

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  17. isn't it something how the simplest things can often be the most painful triggers???

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  18. Lovely images of the four seasons.

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  19. I love
    "when clouds make love to the earth
    with the help of the rains
    soaking it sopping wet"

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  20. there's a lot to this poem! i echo many of the comments, esp the third stanza, and the metaphors of the hose and the can, how it all comes round together.

    really well done!

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  21. One must get a little wet to truly enjoy change. Great poem Gautami!!

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  22. you are so good with the descriptions and connections you make in your poetry

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  23. i throughly enjoyed this and the connection with the nature.

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