Ophelia by Odilion Redon |
lying on that floor
my eyes are closed
my mind open to your every nuance
you bring me flowers
I hold those to me
I am in no mood to inhale the scent
as I am saturated with you
my soul flew to you
as an un-moored kite
you pushed me hard
I fell in a thud on that stretch of ground
where someone had painted the manhole cover, blue
"I will slip into the underground
deep into soulful sleep
you climb every mountain
as high as my sigh"
beautiful...love the words !
ReplyDeleteEvokes so many nuanced feelings as I read this remarkable verse.
ReplyDeleteThe remarkable thing about this beautiful verse is that it conjures up some quite terrible images at the same time. Such a steadfast love betrayed by her lover. Brilliant!
ReplyDeleteEvocative and sensual betrayal! "saturated with you..." is so powerful!
ReplyDeleteI feel the loss of a deep love..a high and low...your words have pulled many thoughts from my mind
ReplyDeleteNice job on combining two prompts!
ReplyDelete=)
Delightful. I see that your first line is this weeks prompt at Carry on Tuesday - I'd love you to post it there too
ReplyDeleteGautami,
ReplyDeleteReaction to betrayal told so forcefully.
Take care
A most refreshing take on the well-known Ophelia story...
ReplyDeleteI am in awe that you could pull those two prompts together ... fabulous verse!
ReplyDeleteYou paint such a wonderful image with every verse. Beautiful.
ReplyDeleteBrilliant!
ReplyDeleteThis is beautiful. Saturated in bitter images, feels like she is waking from a dream.
ReplyDeletejust beautiful!
ReplyDeletean interesting take on combining prompts. Well done!
ReplyDeleteBrings to the fore such a plethora of feelings
ReplyDeletehuh really interesting...i like you looking at it as a blue manhole cover...that is fresh...
ReplyDeleteNice piece...love this!
ReplyDeleteThis is both sensual and romantic. I love your words.
ReplyDeleteThis is one of my favorites this week. Thank you for the rich imagery and unexpected lines.
ReplyDeleteCleverly done.
ReplyDeleteAnna :o]
Very beautiful words :-)
ReplyDeleteLush, tragic, timeless. I love the way you have personalized Ophelia’s story.
ReplyDelete“O, you must wear your rue with a difference"
So much tension of opposites, i think its great
ReplyDeleteOh my.
ReplyDeleteWow.
This was incredibly visual!
Just wonderful writing.
Thank you for sharing this.