in the cheap pages of her colouring book,
she draws pictures,
a ball of yarn, a balloon
a few scattered stars
the sun and the moon
she sketches her mother too
the face being blurred
her dad holding both their hands
her world is small
yet her yearning so big
those colours smudge-
demarcate too
trapping her within
"that blank page at the end says it all for that lonely child"
blizzard watch
ReplyDeletethe toddler colors
outside the lines
Indeed lonely.
ReplyDeleteMs. Tripathy: I abhor commenting off-topic. However, you have challenged me with your past post; I reply in the present and now you are toast as well as “plastered…”
ReplyDeleteI don't know why I find that ball of yarn so appealing, but it seems an unusually apt touch.
ReplyDeletethat was brilliant... lonely and sad, and so touching ...
ReplyDeleteYou did a very good job of breaking out of your customary style and theme to write about a small, sad child. It was beautifully done...
ReplyDeleteA touching capture of childhood. I wonder how many millions of children have drawn in crayon they and their parents holding hands with all the other pleasant observations of innocence? Tis a shame we leave off yarn and ballons and stars and...holding hands. I loved it!
ReplyDeleteRegards,
Donald
Heart rending Gautami... ;(
ReplyDeleteWonderful view from a child's eye - well done!
ReplyDeleteI'm sure you don't want criticism because it's a good poem. But - for what it's worth - it's written from an observer's point of view and too much is said about the child's intent from that POV. Otherwise - it's a wonderfully sensitive poem. One line there - can't see it from this comment area - clinks as too much insight on POV's part.
ReplyDeleteVery nice, Gautami. Its scale is perfectly suited to its subject, the small world of a small girl, stretching to grow into a world.
ReplyDeleteI particularly like:
she sketches her mother too
the face being blurred
...the way it suggests that the child only ever partly knows the parent. The relationship is felt and intuited, but the person is always an enigma...
nicely done Gautami..from the heart indeed....special this Valentine weekend
ReplyDeleteNicely done and sweet!
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed it!
Pamela
"Yearning" - great word you used here and to me, is the essence of the poem. I am grateful you let us into this intimate moment through your words. THANK YOU.
ReplyDeletea few scattered words sweet poet
ReplyDeleteand you've managed to write my
journal in a few short lines...
how could you know?