Saturday 14 May 2011

prickly pines

scented leaves of pine
make me pine for you
thorny needles prick me
that droplet of blood 
is it an omen?
I believe it isn't 
red clay of the earth 
has another story to tell
hush little baby, don't you cry
this isn't goodbye, this isn't goodbye
in orange-grey light, dews do sign bright

"pining pines shed their needles, 
pricking me again and again"

19 comments:

  1. Strong poem. Just like the writer.

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  2. I certainly agree with Amanda. This poem has great weight and is filled with concrete images. Well done!

    Namaste..........cj

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  3. Whoops! I put Addie's name where mine should have been. I have started a blog for her and am managing it. Sorry for the name confusion. I will link using my name until she is ready to take over....................cj

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  4. Gorgeous poem, Gautami.

    Pamela

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  5. I love the goodbye repetition, and there's an 'other world' feeling coming through strongly.

    <3

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  6. Wow! very interesting poetry...well done! Peace and blessings

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  7. I agree with Andy. I like that repetition within such a strong piece.

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  8. This was really rich. I especially like "This isn't goodbye. This isn't goodbye." Very powerful.
    xoRobyn

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  9. This was my favorite part:

    hush little baby, don't you cry
    this isn't goodbye, this isn't goodbye

    Really nice.

    =)

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  10. It works for me. Good rhythm.

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  11. Strong sensations, and a carrying away to a magical space.

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  12. opportunity nicely achieved ...

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  13. A very visual and moving poem!~Ames

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  14. Excellent poem !
    I love how you brought nature in to represent mood of the piece.
    Brimming with emotion, tension and a sense of happiness at some future time ! ( I have to hope it will be so...)

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  15. Powerful. Strong. Multi-faceted. Amazing.

    Wow. Love your visualization.

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