Sunday 17 June 2012

under the surface

Changla: Photo stolen from Suchismita's FB page!!
is there anybody there
not a trace I see
in the cracks of subliminal temper
such a racket
who hid the strings
where is the spare
buried in the snow
my chest saves the draft
such a temper
what did it latch to?
I stop myself from a refrain
can't anyone see me me blend in
does it not strike to someone
all that waiting might have killed me?
has it really been a decade
in my current state?

"I will come out anytime
hit back hard upside down-
those big stones helping me"

18 comments:

  1. When I tried to clearly understand some poetry, I was told to let the words wash over me, and then I would understand - not on an intellectual level, but emotional.....I let your wonderful words wash...

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  2. Sometimes the wait is hard, and there is the same refrain often repeats! You managed very well to combine several prompts.

    I will share a link to one of mine hoping you will visit:

    http://inthecornerofmyeye.blogspot.com/2012/06/renegade.html

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  3. The last stanza reminds me of birth. Excellent write, it washes under the surface. :)

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  4. I enjoyed it..read it few times..to make it sink..it is always such an intellectual feast here... always..thank..

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  5. Gautami, reading this I forgot it was wordle. Nice one.

    Pamela

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  6. yes...I beg of you come out but please don't hit me with the stones...although, I will accept being tumbled about by a few words...

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  7. You have done so well with the wordle........nice to see you at the Pantry, this Sunday morning.

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  9. I like the metaphor of coming out from the cold, even if upside down, to face the world. Nice write. Enjoyed.

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  10. Yikes! I felt the fear, the tremulous desire to move forth... or not.

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  11. What makes us human is our ability to raise ourselves up against adversity, where we had previously been struck down, again and again.

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  12. a wonderful job of combining the prompts into a cohesive poem with the feelings running through it from beginning to end. ♥

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  13. whatever it takes to overcome, that is what me must muster

    good luck with that mary

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  14. Sometimes it seems too hard and too much to do to climb back up and start all over again and yet, yes, we must do it.
    Feel the tension in this for sure. A good write.

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  15. Starting over sounds so simple, but it seldom is. Your poem speaks to the courage needed to do so. And I must agree with Pamela, I forgot this was a wordle. Thank you,

    Elizabeth

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  16. Sometimes it's almost more than a person can handle! Wonderful piece.

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