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| Image by Sarolta Ban |
as I look at the poster of my daughter
with overwhelming fullness in my heart
why has she gone underground?
my search has not ended
why is she unaware of my love
my concern?
when I look at her woolly mittens still on the kitchen table,
why did I admonish her for trivial issue?
now in this black and white world
I taste metal, sick metal.
I want everything returned to previous state.
I no longer care that she prefers to be herself
not what I want her to be.
"her coatless state in that picture is my answer"
Wow......did THIS take a turn.........
ReplyDeleteI can feel the pain of regret.......
So nicely done!!!!!
"I no longer care that she prefers to be herself
ReplyDeletenot what I want her to be."
Beautiful! I love how fully you've filled our man with regret. Very creative back-story!
Very lovely and heartful.
ReplyDeleteI liked this very much!
ReplyDeleteI can feel regret and pain here.
ReplyDeleteSuch a huge loss..lingers like blood on his tongue..beautiful write..Jae
ReplyDeleteI could feel the soul-searching here. Well done.
ReplyDeleteNice take on the prompt:)
ReplyDeleteQuite intense and the underlying pain surfaces so vividly.
ReplyDeleteWow, you painted this word picture so vividly......many parents can likely relate to these thoughts.....
ReplyDeleteYes, it would be nice if we could just skip those teenage years.
ReplyDeleteGreat take on the prompt! A very different direction. Well done. K.
ReplyDeleteHard lesson to learn sometimes.
ReplyDeleteOur poems actually echo each other in a way, the same sentiment of allowing a child to be herself. Enjoyed the poem, thank you.
ReplyDeleteStriking words filled with the emotion of someone who cares.
ReplyDeleteGreat poem. Loved the read. Thank you for visiting my weblog.
ReplyDeleteNamaste
This is powerful, I love it! Regret is indeed a heavy load.
ReplyDeleteThis is very poignant for me at the moment...someone in my family.
ReplyDeleteBeautifully said!
xx
A terrific take on the prompt!
ReplyDeleteA thought provoking poem, really well done:)
ReplyDeleteRegret is an emotional killer, Gautami. Nicely done.
ReplyDeletePamela
A searingly poignant poem.
ReplyDeleteIt brings to mind a blog I once wrote about "home", and what it means. Or should mean.
http://bookpuddle.blogspot.com/2009/02/your-room-is-ready.html
Gautami, you have touched the heart of every mother's fear with this. Whether they run away or simply grow away, you have their mittens, their little-girl thoughts and dreams. Fascinating. Peace, Amy
ReplyDeleteIt is very hard to let go and allow your children make their own way in life. Sometimes by trying to keep them close we drive them away. These are certainly words to think about.
ReplyDeleteI wonder how many parents have ended up feeling this well.
ReplyDeleteA profoundly sad and honest poem. It will remain long in memory.
Well done ...
Beautiful.
ReplyDeleteSad
ReplyDeleteWander
http://wanderwithoutbeinglost.blogspot.com
loved your take on this.. mine was a little along similar lines..
ReplyDeleteThis gave me a shiver!
ReplyDeleteWell done!
I could relate to this one. Maybe all parents of adult children can, at some level.
ReplyDelete=)
very nice work... i too seek beyond the obvious...
ReplyDeleteStunning poem. I can really feel the regret here especially in the last lines. Nicely written.
ReplyDeleteHeart wrenching...
ReplyDeleteWonderful, seamless blending of multiple prompts. :)
ReplyDeleteWe do what we think is best, but sometimes the open doors that they see are the same ones that were so attractive to us and still...we do what we think is best, it is all we can do. Great writing...loved this.
ReplyDeleteSurely a yearning sound and a gaping wound mark this piece. It breathes.
ReplyDeletestrong piece. Love the direction you took with the prompt. The inner dialogue is excellent, really takes control of the piece, the emotions are clearly illustrated. Great job. Thanks
ReplyDeleteYour words are clear. Honest. Fresh. And the story is so relatable. So human.
ReplyDeleteWonderful job with that prompt!
ReplyDeleteyour poem is an anthem for so many mothers who would rather have their
ReplyDeletechild with them as opposed to just like them.
a good ethical poem.
This is a lovely post.. I am here after quite some time.. today I have put my 500th post and remembered you...came for a visit and lo, I find such a beautiful poem..magical..
ReplyDeleteI invite you to visit and read, as you called them once..some dancing verses...
http://rameshsood.blogspot.in/2012/03/my-500th-post.html
Been watching too much Bollywood me thinks!
ReplyDelete